The Internet Explorer

NO, I’m not talking about the ability to withstand a bullet with your eyeballs !

I’m talking about his ability to super-speed-read !

The activity of reading is trivial, and most of us don’t really improve our reading skills. Considering that it is something that all of us use every single day of our life, I think it’s a worthy skill to improve.

One of my favorite ways to read is to Speed-Read, basically blazing past a thick fat wad of words and get all the key points and retain that information as quickly as possible and move on from there.

In other words, I have superman’s eyeballs.

I currently read at the speed of 1000 words per minute !

Gradually, I’m still trying to improve my speed without affecting my ability to comphrehend and retain all that shit I’m fitting into my brain.

(note : DO NOT SPEED-READ IF YOU ARE STUDYING COMPLEX MATERIAL THAT NEEDS MORE THINKING PROCESS. YOU WILL VERY LIKELY NOT SUCCEED AND FAIL FAIL FAIL THAT EXAM. )

So here’s two ways you can get superman’s eyeballs.

I’ve covered Zapreader in the past, and I’m introducing a new program I’ve discovered, the spreeder !

Click : Use spreeder to get superman’s eyeballs.

Click : Use zapreader to get superman’s eyeballs.

Music is captivating. Fun. Good enough for us to pay attention among many things.

But is it possible to hypnotize you ?

Now I believe. Proof ? Me.

I was hypnotized by the musical realization of the motion graphics of john whitney as described in his book “digital harmony”.

I’m talking about this.

It was strangely… peaceful, captivating, and beautiful.

I forgot what the hell I was supposed to do online.

I was hooked.

I would stare at it for minutes, looking at each dot humming it’s way.

This is probably the most hypnotizing music motion graphics I have ever seen.

But Var 16 is just chaotic. My face became like this watching it.

..ll.. (@___@) ..ll..

Oh, you can actually control those dots using a hand crank provided by the site.

Never thought I would be creating music by rotating a hand crank.

By Hypnotized…By Music.

Over the course of being an Internet Explorer, I gained some skills which made me more superior to most human beings.

For example, I can tie my shoes in 3 seconds.

Which makes me the World’s Fastest Shoelace Tying Person.

It’s not a simple knot, but a beautifully tied knot that can be released at a pull of a string.

In 3 seconds.

You want to know how ?

I’ll teach you.

First, wear 100kg dumbbells on your wrists.

Live 10 years of your life with that on.

Soon your hands will be fast enough to tie your shoes in 3 seconds.

That, or you lose your hands. And be handicapped for the rest of your lives.

Hey, it’s worth it !

That’s one way.

The Second Way

This dude covered possibly all the knots there is to tie your shoelaces.

But you only need to know one. The fastest knot, of course ! However there are other kinds of knots designed with more strength for different activities.

Remember to thank me when you tie your shoes in 3 seconds.

Video : FASTEST KNOT

There are a lot of how-to-do-this-and-that blogs in the Internet.

But truly, how many comes with more pictures than words ?
(pictures are worth a thousand words)

And how many would treat idiots with idiotic posts ?

Not many.

But I found one.

There you can learn how to do things you always wanted to do but didn’t have enough brains to do it.

In other words, it’s a blog for idiots.

No doubt many of the postings on that blog are helpful, but at times I wonder if the author has the idea that everyone on earth besides him is a bloody idiot.

I mean, some of his posts are pretty insulting. I listed some below.

How to drink from a packet drink.

How to prepare instant noodle.

How to wash cloth.

How to wear watches.

How to wear earphones.

How to draw/write with your hand.

How to boil water using a kettle.

What the hell ???

At this point I can make the conclusion that the author thinks all his readers are a bunch of 5-year-old babies.

I suspect in time he will be teaching us how to pee and how to shit.

Oh, and how to wipe your shit from your ass using the least amount of tissue papers.
Or better, wipe your ass without the use of tissue papers. (use your hands, then swallow)

Then again, there is still hope in this one.

How to use a condom.

That is by itself the most useful post in his whole blog.

Salvation For Idiots

The game industry has changed a lot.

A decade ago, it was pure simplistic mini games with graphics that looked like vomit.

Then came the playstation. Games were longer, the gameplay improved and graphics were pretty good.

Then somewhere along the way the great war between the playstation 2, Xbox, and Gamecube occured. Gamecube got murdered because their weapons were cute lil baby game titles.

Playstation 2 had an incredible variety of games, and hell, you get to play your old playstation games.

Xbox, with unforgettable titles like HALO, HALO 2, KOTOR, STARWARSBATTLEFRONT, MEDAL OF HONOR, and others was very awesome.

And now the next new generation of consoles are coming up. Promising superior graphics, more realistic games, and revolutionary controllers.

Yet somehow I feel that the concept of a game has diminished.

I mean, when a game takes minutes to load it completely destroys the enjoying experience of the game. Not to mention animations that you can’t skip. If I wanted to watch a movie I would’ve, instead of pressing various buttons and be spoon-fed long beautiful animations that would usually have one or two girls seducing you….. but that’s not the point I am trying to make here !

Better graphics, sure. But better gameplay and experience ? I don’t know.
Special effects in game graphics nowadays aren’t really “Special” anymore. Seen that, been there, done that. I’m quite sick of animations. There is very little content nowadays.

Come to think of it, I may have been subconciously become one of those idiots who are into those Final Fantasy Games, those inhumanely beautiful and overly-cute girls popping out, smiling and giggling at my face can be very hard to resist.

From now on it’s all about GAME-PLAY for me. If you think I’m crazy, please refresh your brainwashed brains with this mini-game I so generously provided below here.

Action speaks louder than words. Just Don’t Smash Your Mouse

I’m sure all of us read.

But really, how many of us can truly SPEED-READ ?

I can read 600 words per minute. Amazing, yeah I know.

But so can you.

I found the Zap Reader.

Zap Reader is a speed reading program available online, free.
You can integrate it into your browser, set the settings of how fast you want to read, and read in speed.

I find this really helpful when I reading news, online. It saves a lot of time, and it provides good exercise for my eyeballs as well. And blogs as well.

I couldn’t believe how fast I could scan word after word in the beginning, it really opened my eyes to my reading speed limit.

I felt like The Flash.

Oh, I’m not responsible if your eyeballs explode.

Read Like The Flash

I am finally proficient in 12 different languages. Here is a simple demonstration.

My name is Nicevil. - English

我的名字是Nicevil 。 - Simplified Chinese

Mijn naam is Nicevil. - Dutch

Mon nom est Nicevil. - French

Mein Name ist Nicevil. - German

Το όνομά μου είναι Nicevil. - Greek

Il mio nome è Nicevil. - Italian

私の名前はNicevil である。 - Japanese

나의 이름은Nicevil이다. - Korean

Meu nome é Nicevil. - Portuguese

Моим именем будет Nicevil. - Russian

Mi nombre es Nicevil. - Spanish

Pretty cool huh ? One of these days I gotta apply to be a translator for the United Nations and help save the world. And I mastered all these languages only today.

Think of all the girls I finally can communicate with. Ho ho ho hoh.
What ? You’re telling me that’s impossible ?

Hah. Non-believers.

I guess seeing is believing. 

Master many languages in a second

Often in life we worry.

And one of the biggest worries we have is really how much time we have left in our lives before we turn into carbons…rotting into mother earth.

Am I exercising enough ? Am I eating right enough ? Am I doing the right thing ? Are my social activity sufficient for a healthy life ?

This questions pop up once in a while, and it’s dead annoying. It’s a distraction.
I’d like to keep my mind clear at all times.

So began my journey to find something, something out there that could possibly give me guidance to life, and measure my time here on earth.

It was a tough and hard and demanding journey…. and after much sweat and pain and 2 minutes less of my life I found www.livingto100.com.

It is a website that calculates your life-expectancy.

If your first impulse is “fear” after seeing the word “life-expectancy”, then your subconscious mind is obviously trying to send the message that you have bad habits.
Then there is even more reason to calculate your life and see how you can improve your life.

So anyways… I went through a series of questions…answered as truthfully as possible.
Because only a dumbass would lie through a LIFE EXPECTANCY CALCULATOR, there’s no point in getting a fake long life expectancy !
Halfway through the questions I learned some of the correct habits to live long.

Less sex, no alcohol, little or no meat, 7 days of exercise, plenty of veggies and fruits…………death almost sounds better than living at this point.

So without further ado, here’s how long I will be living.

Yeah I know ! Who would’ve expected a dumbass like me to live so long !
But calculators don’t lie. Now I don’t need to worry anymore.

Now I am fearless. Muahahahahaha my evil laugh even resonates with power.
I think I’m going to go Skydiving without parachutes.

Click : Check out when you’re going to die.

There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle.
Albert Einstein

Eventhough the starwars movie series has ended, there still many other mediums that are continuing the legacy of kick-ass-jedi-action.

One of them would the new Star Wars game on the next-gen consoles.

Star Wars : Force Unleashed.

This game was created using the Endorphin 3D animation creation software, created by NaturalMotion. It is the very same technology George Lucas is using for his new Indiana game.

The force has never been this satisfying. Oh god replaying the clips over and over again doesn’t seem to get old either..I’m a sadistic jedi-force lover.

Click : The Full-Sized Art

Click : The Kick-Ass trailer

Ever had one of those days where you stumble upon a cool website that offers all kinds of interesting articles you so longed to read ?

And before you know it you are forced to go though the horrendous registering process….
It usually goes like this :

“name ? address ? phone number ? email ? username ? password. hey stupid, password needs to be more than 6 letters. No no that password is too simple try again. You need to have capital letters ! No not all capital letters you dufus ! try again. Nope, try again. try again. try..”

And it ends with frustrated yellings… something like

“NOooooooooooooo…….!!!”

Not today.

Introducing this website, www.bugmenot.com, which allows you to find and share logins for websites that forces you to register !!
Just paste the address of the website you wish to access and it will give you a login account immediately !

Awesome.

Click : Never be bugged again