The Internet Explorer

You must be wondering about the lack of shits recently.

a) I lost my fingers ice skating… I fell.. and… and.. that bloody girl was skating so fast… the iceblades…chopped ma FINGERSSS !!!!……..sob. That’s why I couldn’t blog. I am currently typing with my tongue. Yeehhck.

b) I died. Saving a 10 year old boy who was foolishly picking up a ball in the street. The cars were coming in on him, I dived in and pushed him away… and I got mowed down by 2 cars.. going each in the opposite direction. Splitting up in two isn’t fun. Somehow I am blogging from the heavens. We just got broadband.

c) I was chopping vegetables…. and suddenly the kitchen exploded and the burning vegetables flew at my eyeballs and made me blind. So I couldn’t blog for a while. But now a speech recognizing program can type all my words ! Wait.. or maybe it was that nuclear bomb I tested. I can’t tell. My brain is so screwed up.

d) I realised that I achieved my goal and decided to stop writing for a while. The point was to make people explore the internet…. and have fun. Also, to see how many people would love reading shit. At hundred+ new readers per week, and 10 thousand+ readers, it’s amazing. I achieved my goal. As the saying goes, all good shit must end. We prove it everyday in the toilet. But do not fear, I will shit. One day. A good shit is yet to come, I can feel it rumbling in me.

PS : Oh, it’s just chocolate ice cream up there. Don’t be insane, I did not just shit into a bowl and took a picture of it. I pity you if you couldn’t tell the difference. How the hell do you manage to lick your chocolate ice cream I haven’t the slightest idea.